The Benefits of a Winter Beard....

2 weeks deep into the winter beard...

1. You always get to ride the lift alone, because everyone thinks you are a pervert or will stink like urine.
2. People randomly give you change in parking lots and gas stations because you look homeless.
3. Insulation and never getting wind chapped.
4. No one other than your wife will kiss you so loyalty is not an issue.
5. You get death threats from your family because Christmas is family picture time.
6. You can pee your pants and no one will say anything.
7. You always have a place to store food for later.
8. No one will ask you for directions because you look crazy.
9. Extra 10 mins a day from not shaving.
10. You look like a young Santa Claus.
11. You hear endless references to Teen Wolf, Castaway and Bob Ross.
12. Talking to yourself is socially acceptable.
13. Your wife always has an excuse to get mad at you.